The two of you are amazing; we’ve been in our place for over a year and a half, and we still haven’t unpacked all our boxes… That, more or less, is the kind of praise we’ve received from a number of visitors, upon seeing the progress we had made in eliminating the stack of cartons that had overwhelmed our new apartment, as if we had done something stupendous, like invent a new kind of wheel. As far as we were concerned, we were just doing what comes naturally. That is, if one partner is A.D.D. and the other is on the O.C.D. spectrum (which makes us O.D.D.).
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The Dreaded ‘M’Word — Part 22
I shouldn’t have been surprised to see him sitting in our salon; he did tell me on the phone that he would be in our neighborhood to pay a shiva call on such and such date, and that he might drop by. It’s just that, with everything else going on, I hadn’t been paying full attention. And if nothing else, Jeff deserves one’s full attention.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 21
‘Six months from now you’ll be laughing at all the problems you’ve been having.’ Maybe yes, but most likely no. I’m thinking about a friend of ours who is recovering from major surgery. She might very well feel satisfied with the results and be glad she went through the trauma, but I can’t imagine her and her family feeling giddy about the operation come Pesach time – as in, ‘That was fun; let’s do it again sometime.’ I’ll never look back with nostalgia at what transpired as we relocated from Our Home to THE apartment – even with the benefits that ensued – and yes, there are some, although, as you are correctly surmising, it wasn’t easy.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 20
I was faced with a quasi-existential dilemma. Should I locate my computer in all the chaos, set it up, close the door to what would be my office, and proceed to chronicle our misadventures in the new apartment, or should I direct my attention towards helping Barbara turn our new quarters into something livable? One thing I knew, I would not have the time and energy, let alone the mental acuity to do both at the same time. I chose the latter option, which I am convinced was the right way to go. Now that things have settled down a bit, I feel more inclined to return to where I left off in this sorry saga and continue.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 19
It is sometimes possible to overlook the obvious, even if it is knocking on your door as hard as it can. (Or in our case, ringing the doorbell.) In my last article, I described one of the ‘iron laws of bureaucracy’: Get enough people into the mix, and it’s almost a certainty that one of them will be out sick, on vacation, or – God forbid – sitting shiva when you’re in need of something to get done. All of which is true, but here in The Land these days, if someone is unavailable, the most likely explanation for your person’s absence unfortunately is ‘miluim’ – with no end in sight. Now that I’ve made this emendation, I can get down to the business of the day.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 18
Just imagine this scenario, which I imagine will set the stage for all the turmoil that follows. You’re traveling somewhere in The States without a care in the world, just trying to get from point A to B. All of a sudden, you’re in the middle of a super-sized traffic jam caused by a multi-car accident half a mile ahead of you. You can keep plowing ahead, figuring the road will clear at some point. Or….. you can get off the highway and, with a little ingenuity, get onto a four-lane road that will get you back on the same highway twenty or so miles ahead where there will be smooth sailing ahead. What you don’t realize is that you’ll be going past miles and miles of strip malls that have their own traffic problems. You’re not the only savvy traveler taking this detour, so there is more traffic ahead of you than the road can handle. There’s also all the cars and trucks coming out of the mall parking lots cutting in front of you, slowing you down even more. But the cherry on top of the cake is the traffic light in the middle of all this doing nothing but holding up traffic. Wait a minute, I think I see some police officers up ahead starting to direct traffic. Maybe that will help; otherwise we’ll be here forever.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 17
It’s two steps forward and one step back. That’s the way Barbara has been viewing our progress – or lack thereof – towards acquiring and fixing up THE apartment for occupancy by the agreed upon date of Dec. 3 (2024). I see things differently – because that’s what I do. Here’s how I described what was going on to my brother over the telephone.
The bee’s knees and similar matters
It wasn’t what I expected from a highly regarded international wine guy, now living with his American wife in New Jersey. Out of the blue, there he was on Facebook, presenting his thoughts about the American elections – as opposed to his preferences in Pinot Noir or Malbec. He was not, he wrote, trying to influence anyone’s vote. He was just suggesting that those who do cast a ballot should ‘set aside your personal opinions about the candidates’ personalities and character, and consider their records.’ And, ‘Once you’ve done your homework, evaluate whose policies align better with your values and beliefs, and make an informed decision about who to vote for.’ Fair enough; not too much to quarrel with there. Then I noticed a comment below from his adoring, all-knowing other half, which for the moment put a stop to any further pontification. ‘Ok but u should become a citizen …’ (Bata-boom.)
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 16
Let’s begin this segment with something fairly innocuous, a retelling of a typical conversation between a mother and an adult daughter, going something along these lines:
Mother (a/k/a Barbara) What are your plans for the week?
Daughter (a/k/a Natania) I have a whole bunch of experiments to do, and then there’s all the follow-up I need to get done….
Father (a/k/a Fred, butting in) At least you don’t have to worry about the hagim. Everyone else will also be off Thurs, and Fri., not just you. So whatever you don’t get done…
Daughter I need to remind Oded (her boss) to let our Indian student know it’s Rosh Hashana and not to show up…
As I keep announcing to anyone in earshot, that’s one of the beauties of living in The Land. More often than not, you can actually focus on what’s important, what these holidays are about, without the noise, without the baggage of trying to fit them into the rest of your life, or what everyone around you is involved in – as is usually the case anywhere in the Exile. However, that only works here in The Land if you’re not up to your eyeballs in matters of such consequence that they can’t be put off, that force you to obsess over them and take over a good part of your life. Otherwise, you might as well be in Des Moines or some such. (Well, not really!) One such matter of consequence is known as the “Dreaded ‘M’ Word,” which is why it should be avoided if at all humanly possible.
The Dreaded ‘M’ Word — Part 15
I just thought of a really good explanation; the fact that I could have used it fifteen years ago when it was relevant doesn’t make it any less entertaining. We were at the time in our second year renting an apartment, and the thought of a year three in said apartment brought no joy to our hearts. Then we got a call from a real estate agent we knew. He had two apartments to show us that were for sale, one with three bedrooms and the other the five-bedroom apartment we’re in now and will sadly be leaving sooner than I’d like to think. He questioned why we were interested in the bigger place, as the only occupants would be three of us (plus Mimi, our one cat at the time). Barbara explained that I had a lot of stuff and therefore needed more room than your typical family. A more inventive answer would have been that we had only two bears to work with instead of the normal three!
alittlebiteast 